Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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