it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
