Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
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