Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Randomize