I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
Randomize