Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Randomize
