if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Randomize
