Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
Randomize