I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Randomize