Me. At least after what I've been through.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
It's rum buckets o'clock
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
YAS. BRING CRAB.
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
Randomize