hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
I should be sponsored by Trojan
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
Randomize
