Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
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