new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
Randomize
