GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
Randomize
