fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
