But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
