I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Randomize
