i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
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