Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
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