I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Randomize
