Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize
