Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Randomize