I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Randomize
