This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Randomize