the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize