...so i touched it.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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