I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
Randomize
