idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
Randomize
