this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
Randomize
