she woke up with a sticky ear
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Randomize
