omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
