We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
Randomize
