So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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