we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize
