i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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