Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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