soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
Randomize
