he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
There's always time for handjobs
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
Pro tip: When you spend the afternoon banging your boss, don’t meet your mother-in-law for dinner if you still smell like cum and watermelon flavored lube
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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