you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Randomize
