he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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