I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
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