i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
Randomize