I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
Randomize
