She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
