Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
