Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
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