she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
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