k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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