I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Randomize
