He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Randomize
